Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Neglected

Hi all! Sorry for neglecting you. It seems we all go through seasons where we are right on top of keeping everyone informed about our comings and goings, and visiting every one of our beloved blogs and commenting before we leave; and then seasons where we are not and do not. There is a LOT of neglect going on in my world these latest days. Of course you can put that down to completely losing the use of my right hand for 2 weeks, and to still having to use it with care. You could. And it would be true to a good extent. Over these past couple of weeks, I have had a post brewing in my head about feelings. Specifically being a slave to my feelings. Emotional feelings, intuitive feelings, how I feel physically; and really seeing how these feelings rule my life and my choices. I'm not going to write about it today because I am still pondering - but one of these days, when I feel like it ~ I will. :)
Today I want to show you an example of the neglect, and what I did about it!

We have had a series of lovely days, cool and sunny with low humidity - and today is one of those days. It is also a day that I have an open schedule until it is time to make dinner and then head off to rehearsals and the Ash Wednesday service at church. I of course, came straight to my computer this morning (typing with TWO hands btw) and spent a good deal of time trying to get into the mood to do something else. Chatted with HisGirl about my options for the day and hers (sadly, none of which include us meeting for chai or shopping together) and finally purposed to stop feeling and start doing. Rosebushes it is!

In our front yard, we are working on a stone path and are lining that path with rosebushes. The whole thing is overgrown; well, what of it that is finished anyway. Here are my poor, negelected rosebushes....




Here are the tools for today's project....(that box is for the weeds and clippings - it is from the canister lights that hubby is installing in the kitchen!!)





Here are the rosebushes now.....




Man that feels good.

P.S. - I got interviewed today over at Jewels In My Crown...Someday
that felt good too.
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Wednesday, February 18, 2009

He Knows My Name

Have you ever had a friend like HisGirl?!
As she said, I have been recovering from very minor surgery to my right hand that has had rather intense recovery and left me basically useless for 2 weeks. Surprisingly enough,(that was sarcasm) I took sick the very afternoon that I had been holding twin babies. Sunday morning I woke up for church and literally could not open my eyes because they were bound shut from my cold. Bleck!(seems like I am always sick or injured or BOTH). I wanted to share this song with you because it speaks to my life and the Rock that I stand on.



Whatever my life was, is, or will be, I know I AM just fine. He knows my name.





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Monday, February 16, 2009

Be My Guest

*Waves*
Hello, all! Our beloved S4J has a really nasty cold and her hand is still healing- she asked me to come on over here and post a guest blog to chat with ya'll about a conversation she and I had the other day over the phone.

If she were to tell this tale, she'd likely tell it with music or pictures, both artistic mediums that she uses skillfully, but I can do neither of those things. For over 20 years, she has been the melody in our friendship, singing the soundtrack and holding my hand for just about every major life event I can think of- high school graduation, my wedding, the births of my children... and nearly every "small" event too- nervous breakdowns, crises of faith, burnt dinners. We have honest, raw, silly, hysterical, logical, weepy, giggly, smart, stupid, deeply spiritual conversations pretty much every single day for longer than I can remember. As for me? Well, I'm not the singer or the photographer, but I have always loved that I have the privilege of humming along... even if I'm out of tune.

So anyway, back to the phone conversation we were having this week. We were talking about that verse in Romans...

And I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. I want to do what is right, but I can’t. I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway.


... how true that is for S4J and I. We talked about how she willingly held adorable twins this week with her crippled-from-fresh-surgery-hand knowing full well that she shouldn't . We talked about how often I wake up and turn on my computer before I do my quiet time with Jesus, even though I know if I do, I won't find the time to sit with Him before the end of the day.

We discussed our stupid, selfish natures, disappointed with ourselves when we behave as though we haven't already learned what's best for ourselves- physically, spiritually, emotionally. It's bad enough when we discover something new, but it's just frustrating when we do something ridiculous and we know better.

Why, why, why do we keep doing stupid things when we know we should not? Why do we keep not doing what we know we should do? It's simple; because we are sinners. We're sinners in need of a Savior. Since the beginning of sin, we've delighted in things that are bad for us and complained about things that are good for us.

I find much comfort in Romans chapter 8 in which Paul talks about this same topic with his friends. He points out that while we sin because we're sinners, there is no condemnation in Christ Jesus, that we are no longer bound to sin and we are not slaves to it. There's so much comfort in realizing that the Bible is filled to the brim with humans who fell short all the time- even in Paul’s day… even Paul! There's peace in knowing that we have Jesus Christ who did what we are just not able to do... live a sinless life.

So, what's the point of realizing that we've messed up? That we mess up a lot? That we shall certainly mess up much more in the future? Well, I think there are a few things that can happen (and none of them involve giving up or feeling guilty) :

First: Recognizing when we sin against our better judgment can give us inspiration to improve. That awful feeling of being wrong can be used to motivate us into not behaving that way again if we don't sweep it under the carpet or let it paralyze us.

Second: It can make us appreciate our salvation. That Christ would die for us KNOWING that we would continue sinning is an absolute miracle. Seeing ourselves for what we are should give us a fresh gratitude for His sacrifice.

Third: It can cause us to give more grace to others. We can remember that even well-meaning people do things they don't want to do. Sometimes people who don't mean to hurt us know they should do things but don't. Realizing we do this too should make us kinder and more patient. You know, that whole... to whom much is given much is expected thing. We can’t expect from others what we are unable to accomplish ourselves, can we?

All in all, we just want to encourage you all to keep plugging forward. Don’t get discouraged that you’ve done dumb things. You sin because you are a sinner. That’s no surprise. The miracle is when we break from our sinful nature and do the right thing. And to get a miracle, there’s only one direct route… through Jesus. The only defense… and what a marvelous one it is… is to put our trust in Him. We have to trust God to provide everything we need to resist the ‘shoulds’ and ‘certainly should nots’- and when he provides what we need, (self control, patience, kindness) we need to actually use those tools. That way, hopefully, our regrets will decrease and our victories will increase…all for His glory!


Please join me in praying for an extra dose of those tools for S4J, as she struggles with being both invalid and infirm. Thank you for letting me hijack S4J’s spot. Hopefully, she’ll be back and making the blogosphere more beautiful and melodic soon.



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Monday, February 9, 2009

Lame!

*disclaimer* I am typing with only one hand, and it is not the dominate one. Any typos, lack of capitalization, or improper punctuation you may find offensive in this post you will have to build a bridge and get over it. As-is, this post will probably take like an hour to type.
thanks

A while back I mentioned my ganglion cyst. Over about the last 15months or so, it has broken itself and immediately regrown itself twice. I will spare you the details of what that feels like, but suffice it to say that you just have to go directly to sleep to avoid vomiting. I did lots of internet research to decide on a course of action. Here were my choices....
  • Leave it and hope it goes away on its own (did that and it didnt)
  • Aspirate it; jam a needle in it and suck the gunk out (high rate of return)
  • Hit it with a heavy book such as a Bible or a phone book (risk of secondary injury, and mine grew back after breaking)
  • Have it surgically removed
So, I had decided to leave it because it was only occasionally painful and rarely impeded my mobility. It was just really really gross. However, after a year of it not resolving itself, I was lamenting to a friend who is a nurse that it had broken and regrown itself AGAIN, and she suggested having it looked at. They may need to go in and just clean all the structure out, yada yada yada. Okay fine. Went to my pcm to get referred to a specialist, got referred and waited about 6 weeks for an appt. Did more research. Surgery seemed really minor, outpatient - no big deal. I was so wrong! I had surgery on Monday, the 2nd ofFebruary. I was scheduled to sing a song at PWOC on Tuesday, "no big deal" i thought, "I'll just make sure i have someone to drive me to and from since i'll be on narcotics." I'll stock up some groceries, cancel photography sessions I have that week (just to be on the safe side) Doc said he would supply me with a brace and to keep my hand elevated. Lawdy mercy! Hubby took me home from surgey on monday morning and had to stay with me for 24 hours. Tuesday morning he helped me bathe and dress, and a friend arrived to carry me to PWOC. my hand was so swollen. My song lasted maybe 5 minutes and I nearly fell down. I had a serious lack of body control, a little from nerves, but mostly i yhink from narcotics! I kept my arm in the sling that they fitted me. Just that little activity made my sausages, er, fingers swell up even more and squash all together. (really uncomfortable and gross) Which turned me into a giant freakshow of a distraction during class when i was trying all manner of subtle attempts to get and KEEP my arm above my heart. I got home from PWOC and it took the rest of the day and all night of complete elevation to undo the extra swelling i had caused. Uh-oh. Complete and total underestimation of this 'minor procedure' After days of not being able to even wash my own hair, I had it cut off. And not being able to drive myself to my hair appt turned into a major ordeal so i stopped taking the narcotics. This is why i havent posted - i havent really been doing anything worth making the left-handed effort to write about. No picture taking, no driving, no cooking, no cleaning, no guitar, no crafting. lrft-handed facebooking. So today it has been one week. I have 6 stiches in my right wrist and i don't see the doctor until FRIDAY. i don't mean this to sound complainy - i am just really annoyed with myself for being so completely blase about what was entailed in the surgery and recovery from it. By the way, I finished this post at 11:20

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Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Just To Be Clear

Couldn't say it any better.




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