Let's face it. I am a cold fish. Truth be told, I prefer it that way. Emotions are messy. So, what on earth made me think it would be fun to drive for 6 hours to see my dear friend celebrate wedding nuptials? The same friend who I have walked with since the moment her young husband died and left her with 2 young children 4 years ago. The same friend who I have watched praise the Lord that she did not grieve as those who have no hope. The same friend who I watched as she slowly, with fear and trembling yet beautiful hope, open her heart to the possibility of new love. I couldn't even make it through the rehearsal this afternoon without turning into a mess. I don't like it people. Tomorrow I will watch a man, a good man who's eyes sparkle when he looks at her take her hand and accept the gift of her beautiful heart. I will watch him accept the hands of her children and promise to love them as he loves her. I am feeling absolutely overwhelmed at the intensity of my joy and hope for her and her future. I don't cope well with this level of emotion. It feels like an assault and apparently, I did not behave well as a result. I wonder if I could watch the video of the wedding from my closet with a box of tissues and some chocolate chip cookie dough truffles where no one could see me. And then I could just stay there for like a week while I recover my composure. I think that's reasonable.
Come high noon tomorrow, if you do not see me at the Chapel ~ I will be here. Hiding. My new house for the next 2 nights...
They graciously offer this water bottle right in your room. They claim it will relax and refresh you for only $1.50 but I checked the ingredients list and nowhere did it say "valium" or "medicinal marijuana" so I do not believe the claims.
Ps - Tomorrow I get to post a couple of the Bridal Portraits I took of her. :)
Blessings on your day,