Friday, March 12, 2010

Well. Okay. Yeah. Hm.

Let's face it. I am a cold fish. Truth be told, I prefer it that way. Emotions are messy. So, what on earth made me think it would be fun to drive for 6 hours to see my dear friend celebrate wedding nuptials? The same friend who I have walked with since the moment her young husband died and left her with 2 young children 4 years ago. The same friend who I have watched praise the Lord that she did not grieve as those who have no hope. The same friend who I watched as she slowly, with fear and trembling yet beautiful hope, open her heart to the possibility of new love. I couldn't even make it through the rehearsal this afternoon without turning into a mess. I don't like it people. Tomorrow I will watch a man, a good man who's eyes sparkle when he looks at her take her hand and accept the gift of her beautiful heart. I will watch him accept the hands of her children and promise to love them as he loves her. I am feeling absolutely overwhelmed at the intensity of my joy and hope for her and her future. I don't cope well with this level of emotion. It feels like an assault and apparently, I did not behave well as a result. I wonder if I could watch the video of the wedding from my closet with a box of tissues and some chocolate chip cookie dough truffles where no one could see me. And then I could just stay there for like a week while I recover my composure. I think that's reasonable.

Come high noon tomorrow, if you do not see me at the Chapel ~ I will be here. Hiding. My new house for the next 2 nights...

They graciously offer this water bottle right in your room. They claim it will relax and refresh you for only $1.50 but I checked the ingredients list and nowhere did it say "valium" or "medicinal marijuana" so I do not believe the claims.

Ps - Tomorrow I get to post a couple of the Bridal Portraits I took of her. :)

Blessings on your day,


Becky said...'s a beautiful thing. Looking forward to seeing your pictoral account of it all.

mel said...

Hugs all around.
And crying in Georgia.

Vindiciti said...

....make that 2 crying in Georiga. Ugh! Judi! Disclaimers! You SOOOOO need them! I sooo need tissues. Ugh. Humbug.

MyShilohRanch said...

acckkk...crying in socali too!!! I am afraid that, if I were you, I would totally lose it ... praying you have tissue ... Isn't God's goodness just SOOOOOO overwhelming??!!

lisasmith said...

looking forward to seeing her pics!! and hanging with GGG...even though it'll be virtual since she's on her HONEYMOON!! You've made me fall in love with her. She better watch out. I can be a little stalkerish!

going now to look for the toothbrush story...

Gretchen said...

Dear Cold Fish,
I can understand your feelings, for I would like to avoid all runny mascara and snot ugly cries, too. But I can't because I am:

The Sap.


God's Guitar Girl said...

Oh Jude, you srsly crack me up! I love ya girl!

@Lisa -- stalk away! I'm prayin' for ya and would love to MIRL! Hang in there, tough chica!